bye everybody.
will be back on the 1st.
enjoy ur chinese new year!
muacks
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Sunday, January 22, 2006
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of youI am afraid
Because of you
Because of you
this song is like stuck in my mind for the whole day.
hmm....
think of it, when was the last time u've learnt the hard way because of somebody?
and i particularly like this paragraph in this song:
"I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with"
have u ever felt like this before?
when u got so hurt that you almost felt that u cant breath.
that u can feel nth because ur heart went numb.
and then, u totally shut off to ur surroundings.
u can only feel the numbness of ur heart slowly wear off and den u start to feel them tear and shatter into pieces.
u tried very hard to put on a smile and say "im fine"
den ur eyes begin to have that slight burning sensation.
theres a lump in ur throat that seems very eager to push its way up and u try very hard to push it back down.
and u finally gave in to everything, den tears stream down.
its a very terrible feeling.
i really dunno wad is worse than having this type of feeling.
i went through it twice and to be frank,
its so so so frightening that i think it somehow changed mi emotionally.
somehow, memories of how i got hurt kept coming back to mi when i listen to this song.
perhaps this is one of the reason i dun dare to take a step out.
the fear seems to have grown in mi unknowingly.
its not because of the pain.
its juz because whenever i think of it, it will remind mi how i felt when im hurt and i cannot find anything to forgive the reason that caused mi to be in that state at the point of time.
i think u guys wun know wad im trying to bring across....
wad i really want to say is....
a shattered heart will always be a shattered heart,
no matter wad u do to it,
u cant change the fact that its once shattered.
shall update on my school's life ba.
handed up the 2 killer reports on friday.
this week was really a killer week.
everyday stay in sch till very late and stay awake till wee hours to complete the stupid reports.
supposed to hand up the report at 5pm,
but we cant finish by 5, so handed up at 6pm.
so now im only left with 2 more report(ecm) which i think i wun do much on it since im going to shanghai and it will be due immediately after cny holiday.
3 more presentations to go.
and den followed by exam.
wow! den my attachment period will start!
went to help out for the open house at marketing booth with hx.
so many pple, see le i immediately can feel the dizzy spell coming.
the new diploma - diploma in tourism and resort management is so hot! so many pple asked abt this course!
but the intake is only 80 students nia.
high demand, low supply. haha
den went jp with hx and hm to meet jy, celine, jw and huat for lunch.
had delifrance that i'd craved since 3 days ago.
haha.
after that did some retail theraphy with my parents!
i didnt shop for so long le lor!
and shit! im suppose to finish my ecommerce research and send it to jy by tonight but i haven done anything.
so i should stop here.
most prob wun be blogging again until i return frm shanghai.
take care pple,
dun miss mi too much
and enjoy ur cny!
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of youI am afraid
Because of you
Because of you
this song is like stuck in my mind for the whole day.
hmm....
think of it, when was the last time u've learnt the hard way because of somebody?
and i particularly like this paragraph in this song:
"I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with"
have u ever felt like this before?
when u got so hurt that you almost felt that u cant breath.
that u can feel nth because ur heart went numb.
and then, u totally shut off to ur surroundings.
u can only feel the numbness of ur heart slowly wear off and den u start to feel them tear and shatter into pieces.
u tried very hard to put on a smile and say "im fine"
den ur eyes begin to have that slight burning sensation.
theres a lump in ur throat that seems very eager to push its way up and u try very hard to push it back down.
and u finally gave in to everything, den tears stream down.
its a very terrible feeling.
i really dunno wad is worse than having this type of feeling.
i went through it twice and to be frank,
its so so so frightening that i think it somehow changed mi emotionally.
somehow, memories of how i got hurt kept coming back to mi when i listen to this song.
perhaps this is one of the reason i dun dare to take a step out.
the fear seems to have grown in mi unknowingly.
its not because of the pain.
its juz because whenever i think of it, it will remind mi how i felt when im hurt and i cannot find anything to forgive the reason that caused mi to be in that state at the point of time.
i think u guys wun know wad im trying to bring across....
wad i really want to say is....
a shattered heart will always be a shattered heart,
no matter wad u do to it,
u cant change the fact that its once shattered.
shall update on my school's life ba.
handed up the 2 killer reports on friday.
this week was really a killer week.
everyday stay in sch till very late and stay awake till wee hours to complete the stupid reports.
supposed to hand up the report at 5pm,
but we cant finish by 5, so handed up at 6pm.
so now im only left with 2 more report(ecm) which i think i wun do much on it since im going to shanghai and it will be due immediately after cny holiday.
3 more presentations to go.
and den followed by exam.
wow! den my attachment period will start!
went to help out for the open house at marketing booth with hx.
so many pple, see le i immediately can feel the dizzy spell coming.
the new diploma - diploma in tourism and resort management is so hot! so many pple asked abt this course!
but the intake is only 80 students nia.
high demand, low supply. haha
den went jp with hx and hm to meet jy, celine, jw and huat for lunch.
had delifrance that i'd craved since 3 days ago.
haha.
after that did some retail theraphy with my parents!
i didnt shop for so long le lor!
and shit! im suppose to finish my ecommerce research and send it to jy by tonight but i haven done anything.
so i should stop here.
most prob wun be blogging again until i return frm shanghai.
take care pple,
dun miss mi too much
and enjoy ur cny!
Monday, January 16, 2006
its quite obvious that i didnt prepare well for today's presentation isnt it?
stammering and repeating what i'd said,
looking at my script for next slide's information.
oOO....prolly due to lack of sleep.
ahh....excuses!
haha.
wadever.
its over!
1 presentation down.
had 36 hours of project marathon over at tobbie's house last weekend.
can kill.
had less than 10 hours of sleep for the past 2 days
and my right hand is "disfigured".
thanks to the mosquitoes at tobbie's hse.
zZZ. i should sleep now.
nites!
stammering and repeating what i'd said,
looking at my script for next slide's information.
oOO....prolly due to lack of sleep.
ahh....excuses!
haha.
wadever.
its over!
1 presentation down.
had 36 hours of project marathon over at tobbie's house last weekend.
can kill.
had less than 10 hours of sleep for the past 2 days
and my right hand is "disfigured".
thanks to the mosquitoes at tobbie's hse.
zZZ. i should sleep now.
nites!
Monday, January 09, 2006
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
i really dunno how m i going to survive thru this semester.
everything is in a mess.
everything seems to move on with a speed of 150km/h
i really dunno how i actually spent my day.
i juz know, i wake up, go to sch, sometimes do project, go home, sleep.
theres no meaning in whatever i do.
i do my project so i can meet datelines.
and when datelines are approaching, i start to panick, cos i haven really been doing my project
research.
so what have i been doing when i claimed that im busy over projects?
haha.
i hate it when the direction is so ambiguous,
and yet u muz continue to think and brainstorm for suggestions and ideas.
i hate it when i muz tolerate unnecessary nonsense when it wasnt exactly my fault in the 1st
place.
i hate it when it starts to rain when im all ready to revise for my test.
i hate it when im really desperate and nobody wanna help.
i hate it when i volunteer for stupid and lousy job when no one wanna do it.
all in all,
i hate what is going on in my life now.
i juz want to be like a spoilt brat for now,
throwing my tantrums around like nobody business.
when my heart is screaming loudly, who can actually hear mi?
everything is in a mess.
everything seems to move on with a speed of 150km/h
i really dunno how i actually spent my day.
i juz know, i wake up, go to sch, sometimes do project, go home, sleep.
theres no meaning in whatever i do.
i do my project so i can meet datelines.
and when datelines are approaching, i start to panick, cos i haven really been doing my project
research.
so what have i been doing when i claimed that im busy over projects?
haha.
i hate it when the direction is so ambiguous,
and yet u muz continue to think and brainstorm for suggestions and ideas.
i hate it when i muz tolerate unnecessary nonsense when it wasnt exactly my fault in the 1st
place.
i hate it when it starts to rain when im all ready to revise for my test.
i hate it when im really desperate and nobody wanna help.
i hate it when i volunteer for stupid and lousy job when no one wanna do it.
all in all,
i hate what is going on in my life now.
i juz want to be like a spoilt brat for now,
throwing my tantrums around like nobody business.
when my heart is screaming loudly, who can actually hear mi?
Sunday, January 01, 2006
once again, a very happy new year to all!
went to shears bridge to watch fireworks with kenny, zanyan,zhenwen,changyi,chinhwa,amanda,xin and jia last nite!
so cool!
it was like i can touch the fireworks if i stretch my hands!!!
but abit scary also.
cos the fireworks sound goes like "bom bom bom!!!" and can really feel the vibrations!
im was like so high lor!
after that, walked to bugis to take train home.
den after discussion, we decided not to go home.
so went to my grandparents house at changi rise.
played black jack
and i lose $$
its all with lin jia min, that lucky gal.
yawn, so tired.
think im gonna slp now.
went to shears bridge to watch fireworks with kenny, zanyan,zhenwen,changyi,chinhwa,amanda,xin and jia last nite!
so cool!
it was like i can touch the fireworks if i stretch my hands!!!
but abit scary also.
cos the fireworks sound goes like "bom bom bom!!!" and can really feel the vibrations!
im was like so high lor!
after that, walked to bugis to take train home.
den after discussion, we decided not to go home.
so went to my grandparents house at changi rise.
played black jack
and i lose $$
its all with lin jia min, that lucky gal.
yawn, so tired.
think im gonna slp now.
tagged
Rules of the game: Post 5 Weird and Random facts about yourself, then at the end list the names of 5 people who are next in line to do this. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "You are tagged" in their blog and tell them to read yours.
1. i do thing according to my mood. some people says its attitute. but, who cares. when i really dun have the mood, it will be meaningless to continue to do the things im supposed to do.in other words, im unpredictable.
2. i dunno how to express myself well. sometimes its the pride, sometimes its my lousy communicating skills.
3. im good at concealing my feelings. i dun show my feelings unless necessary.
4. i love potatoes and sunny-side-up! really love them. and if eating fastfood, i'll finish up my fries 1st den continue with the maincourse.
5. i always have weird dreams. and i mean weird. sometimes ridiculous oso. and my dreams mostly end up with me crying at a beach that i always dream abt.
next 5 pple : michelle, maggie, huixian,xin,jiamin
1. i do thing according to my mood. some people says its attitute. but, who cares. when i really dun have the mood, it will be meaningless to continue to do the things im supposed to do.in other words, im unpredictable.
2. i dunno how to express myself well. sometimes its the pride, sometimes its my lousy communicating skills.
3. im good at concealing my feelings. i dun show my feelings unless necessary.
4. i love potatoes and sunny-side-up! really love them. and if eating fastfood, i'll finish up my fries 1st den continue with the maincourse.
5. i always have weird dreams. and i mean weird. sometimes ridiculous oso. and my dreams mostly end up with me crying at a beach that i always dream abt.
next 5 pple : michelle, maggie, huixian,xin,jiamin
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