found this nice song in youtube! i think its a sweet song which makes me wanna fall in love again.
Janice - In Love again
Now Playing:
When you smile
my life becomes a ray of light
sing me a lullaby to sleep at midnight
I'll be hypnotized
when looked into your eyes
turn off the room light
let's spend the night
*Take me to far away
Away to your secret place
Take my tears my fears
Take all my pain for which
I'll repay Someday with a kiss and say
Can't believe that I'm in love
in love again
When the stars don't shine
And when the birds don't fly
And when the flowers cry
And when the rain runs dry
When the violet's red
and when the rose turn blue
Baby I'll still be in love with you
Saturday, March 31, 2007
came across one of my primary school friend's blog,
and theres this which i think is quite true.
go try it out!
http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg/
You are feeling exhausted, worn out, drained. You feel that far too much is being asked of you but you still want to overcome these difficulties and establish yourself despite the effect such an effort seems to have on you. You are a proud person, assertive most of the time, but at this particular moment you are acting as if you have become resigned to the situation. What you need is some tender loving care - a gentle pat on the head (or maybe a 'kick-up-the backside') and then you'll be raring to go.
(omg. this para is so damn accurately true. im speechless.)
Recently you have been experiencing considerable mental anguish and turmoil. You are bored and discontent. Nothing seems to be going right for you. Even your relationships aren't working out and you don't quite know which way to turn.
(i really think the test is scary, as if it can read my mind and heart. eeyer!)
Your confidence has been shattered. There are so many things that you would like to do with your life, so many dreams to be fulfilled - and you know that your hopes and dreams are not just figments of your imagination, they are real and you are looking for reassurance from someone. Basically your fears are such that you may be prevented in attaining your hopes and dreams. Even now you would like to broaden your fields of endeavour but in order to develop your 'inner- self' you need peace and solace. You are distressed by the fear that you may be prevented from attaining your goals. What you really need at this particular moment in time is quiet reassurance from someone close to you to restore your confidence.
(ya. true)
Whatever you strive to do, something always seems to be holding you back. There is no subterfuge in you. You are a clear thinker and all you demand from life, in a relationship, is a partner whom you can trust and with whom you can, together, develop a foundation of trust based on understanding. You are your own person and you demand freedom of thought to follow your own convictions. You have no interest in 'two-timing' and all you seek is sincerity and 'straight-dealing'.
You are trying to build up your own position and you resist all external influences. You insist that you are your own person and you will not tolerate any outside interference. Decisive and proud, you are true managerial material. (haha. i only think the last sentence not true as i think im not fit for managerial position and im not decisive.)
and theres this which i think is quite true.
go try it out!
http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg/
You are feeling exhausted, worn out, drained. You feel that far too much is being asked of you but you still want to overcome these difficulties and establish yourself despite the effect such an effort seems to have on you. You are a proud person, assertive most of the time, but at this particular moment you are acting as if you have become resigned to the situation. What you need is some tender loving care - a gentle pat on the head (or maybe a 'kick-up-the backside') and then you'll be raring to go.
(omg. this para is so damn accurately true. im speechless.)
Recently you have been experiencing considerable mental anguish and turmoil. You are bored and discontent. Nothing seems to be going right for you. Even your relationships aren't working out and you don't quite know which way to turn.
(i really think the test is scary, as if it can read my mind and heart. eeyer!)
Your confidence has been shattered. There are so many things that you would like to do with your life, so many dreams to be fulfilled - and you know that your hopes and dreams are not just figments of your imagination, they are real and you are looking for reassurance from someone. Basically your fears are such that you may be prevented in attaining your hopes and dreams. Even now you would like to broaden your fields of endeavour but in order to develop your 'inner- self' you need peace and solace. You are distressed by the fear that you may be prevented from attaining your goals. What you really need at this particular moment in time is quiet reassurance from someone close to you to restore your confidence.
(ya. true)
Whatever you strive to do, something always seems to be holding you back. There is no subterfuge in you. You are a clear thinker and all you demand from life, in a relationship, is a partner whom you can trust and with whom you can, together, develop a foundation of trust based on understanding. You are your own person and you demand freedom of thought to follow your own convictions. You have no interest in 'two-timing' and all you seek is sincerity and 'straight-dealing'.
You are trying to build up your own position and you resist all external influences. You insist that you are your own person and you will not tolerate any outside interference. Decisive and proud, you are true managerial material. (haha. i only think the last sentence not true as i think im not fit for managerial position and im not decisive.)
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Sunday, March 25, 2007
and so,
the funeral ended with over 100 friends and relative going to the crematorium with us,
watching him being slowly pushed to the place where he gonna be cremate is like so terrible
with all of us crying and shouting for ah gong,
its the most heart-wrenching scenario ever.
i dunno how much i've cried during that 5 days of funeral.
i just know that when i start crying, it cant seems to stop.
thanks to mummy,
she cry until so jia lat,
that influenced everyone ard her to cry too.
my sisters and i cried our hearts out and when ye ye saw us, he cried too.
the moment when i really cannot take it is when we are supposed to see ah gong the last time before they cover the coffin.
everyone in sight cried.
i want to remember how he looked before he gets cremated, and i will never get the chance again.
i swear that the laws and rules of the funeral is mean.
the rule says that wife cannot accompany husband to the crematorium.
and so, my ah ma have to stay at the funeral,
watching ah gong being drove away,
crying.
i witness this scene,
and my heart like goes aching like hell.
how could the rule do this?
so wu qing.
thursday ritual was tiring and i got burnt by the joss stick, and now, i have a burnt mark on my fingers.
it was sure painful, but i treat it as a gift that ah gong left it on me.
saw ah gong ashes yesterday.
his bones were white and pinkish,
and the master there told us that ah gong is a kind and good man,
that explains the colour of his bones.
im so happy upon hearing that,
cos he is truely a kind one in my heart!
the funeral had taken a toll on all of us, mentally and physically.
i still feel depressed sometimes,
but i chose not to show it.
cos i know ah gong, wont want me to feel that way.
i really missed my ah gong.
the funeral ended with over 100 friends and relative going to the crematorium with us,
watching him being slowly pushed to the place where he gonna be cremate is like so terrible
with all of us crying and shouting for ah gong,
its the most heart-wrenching scenario ever.
i dunno how much i've cried during that 5 days of funeral.
i just know that when i start crying, it cant seems to stop.
thanks to mummy,
she cry until so jia lat,
that influenced everyone ard her to cry too.
my sisters and i cried our hearts out and when ye ye saw us, he cried too.
the moment when i really cannot take it is when we are supposed to see ah gong the last time before they cover the coffin.
everyone in sight cried.
i want to remember how he looked before he gets cremated, and i will never get the chance again.
i swear that the laws and rules of the funeral is mean.
the rule says that wife cannot accompany husband to the crematorium.
and so, my ah ma have to stay at the funeral,
watching ah gong being drove away,
crying.
i witness this scene,
and my heart like goes aching like hell.
how could the rule do this?
so wu qing.
thursday ritual was tiring and i got burnt by the joss stick, and now, i have a burnt mark on my fingers.
it was sure painful, but i treat it as a gift that ah gong left it on me.
saw ah gong ashes yesterday.
his bones were white and pinkish,
and the master there told us that ah gong is a kind and good man,
that explains the colour of his bones.
im so happy upon hearing that,
cos he is truely a kind one in my heart!
the funeral had taken a toll on all of us, mentally and physically.
i still feel depressed sometimes,
but i chose not to show it.
cos i know ah gong, wont want me to feel that way.
i really missed my ah gong.
Monday, March 19, 2007
he ended his sufferings on 19 Mar 2007,
after suffering for 25days in the hospital,
he left, peacefully.
forever in my memories,
he will always be a great cook.
the days when he took me for ferry ride when i was young,
the days when he would punish me to stand outside the house when im naughty,
the days when he will bring me to the playground before dinner,
the days when he always say he bought ice cream and we can only eat it if we finish our dinner fast.
the days when he would travel overseas with us.
the moments when he told us about his story about his life with grandma.
i'll miss the delicious popiah that he always make.
i'll miss the egg that he specially cooked for my sis if we dine at his place.
i'll miss his new year yu sheng that he always prepare all by himself for the past new year.
the last thing that he asked me to help him,
was to help him calculate the number of hours he had worked,
to ensure that his employer gave the correct wages to him.
as i watched him getting weaker day by day, suffering in pain,
couldnt eat, couldnt talk,
my heart ached, and i can only hope that his sufferings can end soon.
and today, his sufferings ended.
forever in my memories,
my beloved ah gong.
rest in peace.
after suffering for 25days in the hospital,
he left, peacefully.
forever in my memories,
he will always be a great cook.
the days when he took me for ferry ride when i was young,
the days when he would punish me to stand outside the house when im naughty,
the days when he will bring me to the playground before dinner,
the days when he always say he bought ice cream and we can only eat it if we finish our dinner fast.
the days when he would travel overseas with us.
the moments when he told us about his story about his life with grandma.
i'll miss the delicious popiah that he always make.
i'll miss the egg that he specially cooked for my sis if we dine at his place.
i'll miss his new year yu sheng that he always prepare all by himself for the past new year.
the last thing that he asked me to help him,
was to help him calculate the number of hours he had worked,
to ensure that his employer gave the correct wages to him.
as i watched him getting weaker day by day, suffering in pain,
couldnt eat, couldnt talk,
my heart ached, and i can only hope that his sufferings can end soon.
and today, his sufferings ended.
forever in my memories,
my beloved ah gong.
rest in peace.
Friday, March 16, 2007
my dear desktop decided to die on me on wednesday night.
that explains my sudden disappearance from the internet world.
this got its pros and cons.
pros: im slping early cos i've got nth to do.
cons: its damn boring at home. eversince exams ended, staying at homes means TV and Internet. Now that my second source of entertainment is gone, and the other source of entertainment shows boring programmes, it drives me to bed.
im like stucked in this telemarketing job.
i've worked for like7days already, and i've not closed any sales.
and that jack-look-a-liked who only came for like 3 days managed to close a sale for his project.
i think im just plain suay lar.
he only follow up my ex-colleague's work, and he got the sale.
while me, slog hard through the usual office hours, call and call, but still kanna rejected.
i want COMMISSION.
but no one wanna come to the conference im sellling!
theres another reason y im suay.
i bought my loreal mosturiser from watson last night.
and when i reached home and conference chat with jy and hm,
jy told me metro having 20% sales.
THIS IS THE SECOND TIME THAT SUCH INCIDENT OCCURRED TO ME.
shit my luck.
and just as im planning for a reason to quit my work,
i received another negative news that prevent me from quitting.
well...i guessed this is a sign telling me that i should stay on the boring telemarketing job till this project ends, and hopefully i can close some deals while following up on the emails i sent this week.
chatted with jy and hm and told them how scary i've became.
the reason y im hanging on this boring job is because of money.
maybe its because studies is not my primary focus now,
i tend to think of money every moment.
i have to say that, money is really the only motivation for me to stay in this job, as in i dun find any joy while working. but for the sake of feeding my bank account, i shall hang on. i guessed, if it was last time, i would have probably quit my job in less than 3 days.
im getting used to my pretty much routinised life now.
every morning wake up at 7.20am,
leave house at 8am,
reach office at 9am,
pick up phone and start calling,
look forward to highlight of the morning, which is lunch break at 1pm.
go back to office at exactly 2pm,
start to call till 6pm,
and leave the office at exactly 6pm.
thr goes 1 day unknowingly.
im taking up swimming once again.
im thinking if i should buy a new swim suit for myself,
since i've always been wearing my mum's and i dun think it fitted well....
i guessed, i'll only start thinking about this when my pay comes in.
money money money!
i think i wont be able to login so frequently,
because, my sisters will all be fighting over the use of this old laptop,
and everytime i reach home, they will use, turn by turn,
but it will never get to my turn.
the cons of having too many siblings.
weekdays gg HK next week.
gers, enjoy ur trip there and take good care of yourselves alright?!
that explains my sudden disappearance from the internet world.
this got its pros and cons.
pros: im slping early cos i've got nth to do.
cons: its damn boring at home. eversince exams ended, staying at homes means TV and Internet. Now that my second source of entertainment is gone, and the other source of entertainment shows boring programmes, it drives me to bed.
im like stucked in this telemarketing job.
i've worked for like7days already, and i've not closed any sales.
and that jack-look-a-liked who only came for like 3 days managed to close a sale for his project.
i think im just plain suay lar.
he only follow up my ex-colleague's work, and he got the sale.
while me, slog hard through the usual office hours, call and call, but still kanna rejected.
i want COMMISSION.
but no one wanna come to the conference im sellling!
theres another reason y im suay.
i bought my loreal mosturiser from watson last night.
and when i reached home and conference chat with jy and hm,
jy told me metro having 20% sales.
THIS IS THE SECOND TIME THAT SUCH INCIDENT OCCURRED TO ME.
shit my luck.
and just as im planning for a reason to quit my work,
i received another negative news that prevent me from quitting.
well...i guessed this is a sign telling me that i should stay on the boring telemarketing job till this project ends, and hopefully i can close some deals while following up on the emails i sent this week.
chatted with jy and hm and told them how scary i've became.
the reason y im hanging on this boring job is because of money.
maybe its because studies is not my primary focus now,
i tend to think of money every moment.
i have to say that, money is really the only motivation for me to stay in this job, as in i dun find any joy while working. but for the sake of feeding my bank account, i shall hang on. i guessed, if it was last time, i would have probably quit my job in less than 3 days.
im getting used to my pretty much routinised life now.
every morning wake up at 7.20am,
leave house at 8am,
reach office at 9am,
pick up phone and start calling,
look forward to highlight of the morning, which is lunch break at 1pm.
go back to office at exactly 2pm,
start to call till 6pm,
and leave the office at exactly 6pm.
thr goes 1 day unknowingly.
im taking up swimming once again.
im thinking if i should buy a new swim suit for myself,
since i've always been wearing my mum's and i dun think it fitted well....
i guessed, i'll only start thinking about this when my pay comes in.
money money money!
i think i wont be able to login so frequently,
because, my sisters will all be fighting over the use of this old laptop,
and everytime i reach home, they will use, turn by turn,
but it will never get to my turn.
the cons of having too many siblings.
weekdays gg HK next week.
gers, enjoy ur trip there and take good care of yourselves alright?!
Saturday, March 10, 2007
i swear real hard that this is the most dissapointing and sad grad ball ever!
i had freaking thick and ugly make-up on,
with the most disgusting messy hair in the world.
and worst of all, it still cost 59 bucks.
how could they do this to me,
when its supposed to be one of the greatest event in every girl's life.
perhaps jiayi is right,
the make-up artist cum hair stylist hates me!
when i looked at the pictures,
i just feel like smashing the monitor,
and if possible,
destroy the evidence of my presence at the grad ball.
i really looked so freaking disgusting extremely UGLY.
im still considering if i should ask huimei to send me the pictures,
but it will only remind me of how disgusting i looked and how the money was spent on the disgusting make-up and hair.
i dun even dare to show my parents the picture we took that night.
IM SO DEPRESSED, COS I FELT THAT I WAS THE UGLIEST GIRL THAT NIGHT.
went to dblo for my very first club experience with my classmates after gradball. (and yes, still with the disgusting make-up on.)
it was fun lar, dancing and stuffs,
but because of my depressed mood, i didnt really enjoy.
nothing could make me better now.
no matter how much consolations i get frm friends, telling me im not ugly,
no matter how much assurance from my boyfriend that im not ugly,
no matter how much i tell myself that im not ugly,
BUT THE FACT IS, IM SO UGLY THAT NIGHT
THAT SUCK IN EVERY PICTURE I TOOK,
AND SPOIL THE WHOLE PICTURE IF ITS A GROUP PHOTO.
if i ever get a chance to erase something out of my life,
this gradball would definitely be one of them.
oh....i guess i will dwell on this for at least 3 months.
if only i could turn back time.....
i had freaking thick and ugly make-up on,
with the most disgusting messy hair in the world.
and worst of all, it still cost 59 bucks.
how could they do this to me,
when its supposed to be one of the greatest event in every girl's life.
perhaps jiayi is right,
the make-up artist cum hair stylist hates me!
when i looked at the pictures,
i just feel like smashing the monitor,
and if possible,
destroy the evidence of my presence at the grad ball.
i really looked so freaking disgusting extremely UGLY.
im still considering if i should ask huimei to send me the pictures,
but it will only remind me of how disgusting i looked and how the money was spent on the disgusting make-up and hair.
i dun even dare to show my parents the picture we took that night.
IM SO DEPRESSED, COS I FELT THAT I WAS THE UGLIEST GIRL THAT NIGHT.
went to dblo for my very first club experience with my classmates after gradball. (and yes, still with the disgusting make-up on.)
it was fun lar, dancing and stuffs,
but because of my depressed mood, i didnt really enjoy.
nothing could make me better now.
no matter how much consolations i get frm friends, telling me im not ugly,
no matter how much assurance from my boyfriend that im not ugly,
no matter how much i tell myself that im not ugly,
BUT THE FACT IS, IM SO UGLY THAT NIGHT
THAT SUCK IN EVERY PICTURE I TOOK,
AND SPOIL THE WHOLE PICTURE IF ITS A GROUP PHOTO.
if i ever get a chance to erase something out of my life,
this gradball would definitely be one of them.
oh....i guess i will dwell on this for at least 3 months.
if only i could turn back time.....
Sunday, March 04, 2007
23rd Feb
relatives gathered at my house.
its also the day when i decided to go on diet for grad ball.
however, it failed terribly cos my mum cooked my favourite curry!
my mum is evil!!! how to resist her curry?!!!
this is my 8 months old baby cousin.
she can never stop moving her small little body even when u are carry her.
therefore, we could not capture a still image of her.
nevertheless, she's so cute!
u smile, she smile.
u never smile, she'll still smile.
she's not afraid of strangers, who also can carry her!
and the best thing is, she got long lashes.
im so jealous!
24th Feb -- weekdays CNY steamboat gathering at amanda's house
i love amanda's house because her living room's wall is PINK.
totally warm and pretty. i love it.
this time round, teck chiat wasnt there, so no camera man, so we didnt managed to take much photos.
another reason y i love her house.
The sheet of mirror infront of her dinning table.
i fall in love with myself sometimes. haha. *shy*
after eating and a little of black jack at her house, we decided to go parkway to chat over a cuppa.
we took a bus from woodlands interchange to parkway.
the whole journey took 1 hour.
zZZZ.
upon reaching parkway,
cxin wanted to deposit some cash.
and beside the cash deposit machine,
there is this.....
and so i decided to try my luck.
slit in my 1 dollar coin.
turn the knob,
hoping to get a beautiful coin pouch.
and i got the green one.
i tot mine was ugly at 1st.
but the more i look at it, the more cute i felt it was.
but all of us, agreed that mine wasnt the ugliest.
the mickey mouse was the ugliest!
haha!
me and my cute green 'dou ji yen' coin pounch.
and oh, i love my pink nails.
2nd March 2007
went to ubi driving centre to supposrt chun hui.
and we received good news from amada and jiamin that they did well for their "A" levels.
feel so happy for them.
went to sakae at changi airport for dinner with them, even though i was super tired.
discuss abit about their upcoming HK trip,
and suggested some recommendations for them.
and when i reached home, i was shocked.
my eyes were super red.
i dunno y this always happen to my eye.
poor eye.
next up will my my gradball at 8th mar.
hopefully, i will be able to make it.
relatives gathered at my house.
its also the day when i decided to go on diet for grad ball.
however, it failed terribly cos my mum cooked my favourite curry!
my mum is evil!!! how to resist her curry?!!!
this is my 8 months old baby cousin.
she can never stop moving her small little body even when u are carry her.
therefore, we could not capture a still image of her.
nevertheless, she's so cute!
u smile, she smile.
u never smile, she'll still smile.
she's not afraid of strangers, who also can carry her!
and the best thing is, she got long lashes.
im so jealous!
24th Feb -- weekdays CNY steamboat gathering at amanda's house
i love amanda's house because her living room's wall is PINK.
totally warm and pretty. i love it.
this time round, teck chiat wasnt there, so no camera man, so we didnt managed to take much photos.
another reason y i love her house.
The sheet of mirror infront of her dinning table.
i fall in love with myself sometimes. haha. *shy*
after eating and a little of black jack at her house, we decided to go parkway to chat over a cuppa.
we took a bus from woodlands interchange to parkway.
the whole journey took 1 hour.
zZZZ.
upon reaching parkway,
cxin wanted to deposit some cash.
and beside the cash deposit machine,
there is this.....
and so i decided to try my luck.
slit in my 1 dollar coin.
turn the knob,
hoping to get a beautiful coin pouch.
and i got the green one.
i tot mine was ugly at 1st.
but the more i look at it, the more cute i felt it was.
but all of us, agreed that mine wasnt the ugliest.
the mickey mouse was the ugliest!
haha!
me and my cute green 'dou ji yen' coin pounch.
and oh, i love my pink nails.
2nd March 2007
had our marketing plan competition.
the day finally came.
i think i've sacrificed alot for this competition.
i rejected to job opportunities because of this.
supposed to assemble at 8am in the morning,
but we met at 6.30am in school that day to do some last min preparation.
tats so early lor!
i woke up at 4.30am to change to do my make up and stuffs.
so early!
the worst thing is, the 1st bus was at 6.24am,
so i had to trouble my mum to drive me to the mrt station at 5.40am.
thanks mummy~
although the results was abit dissapponting for us,
but its alright,
cos through this competition,
i've really learnt alot alot from my team mates, my coach and my tutor.
eventhough sometimes this project almost had us all breakdown, drained out of ideas,
i still dreaded the end of this competition,
cos this means that we're really gonna leave SP for real.
This competition marks the end of the project and student life.
my team mates - 21900!
us and Mr Cho, our coach for this competition
The champions~
felt so proud for our class man!
Thank you classmates and lecturers,
for all the wonderful experience and memories in SP.
went to ubi driving centre to supposrt chun hui.
and we received good news from amada and jiamin that they did well for their "A" levels.
feel so happy for them.
went to sakae at changi airport for dinner with them, even though i was super tired.
discuss abit about their upcoming HK trip,
and suggested some recommendations for them.
and when i reached home, i was shocked.
my eyes were super red.
i dunno y this always happen to my eye.
poor eye.
next up will my my gradball at 8th mar.
hopefully, i will be able to make it.
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